Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Spilled Juice...but who was angry?

It was a busy day. I was cranky because we haven't had heat (or air, might I add, during the heat wave a little bit ago) and I was chilly. I had already done dishes, started laundry, cleaned and swept and wiped tables down, and started school with Seana AND cleaned up other messes.

I was tired.

And with not feeling well for a couple weeks now all I wanted was to go through the rest of the day and basically find rest.

Instead, in the middle of correcting Joeby and teaching Seana, Sadie comes downstairs and tells me her juice (not the typical non-stain happy apple juice I like to give them mind you, but cranberry to fight  the lovely UTI which as consumed our days with innumerable bathroom visits recently) has, "Spilled everywhere!"

I.was.not.happy!

Okay, okay, I'll be honest, I was ANGRY!

I marched my way up the stairs and asked her to show me where she spilled it. Then I asked her how it happened. I was surprised by her answer. She told me how Joeby tried to bring it down to her and she wanted to do it herself so that made her mad. She said she brought it back up and slammed it on the table and she even demonstrated the look she had on her face while doing so.

Initially, I wanted to tell Sadie to be more careful... But when I realized that this spill had nothing to do with clumsiness or lack of careful handling something spoke to my heart.

I began to pray. I thanked God that He cared enough about my little girl that He didn't want her anger to just go unnoticed. I thanked Him that He wanted her heart to be molded and teachable and that he wanted her to grow in wisdom and knowledge, patience and gentleness and that He wanted to produce a fruit of righteousness in her little heart and life. He allowe her "act" to be caught so that He could work out something more in her!

And then I prayed for me. I prayed for His wisdom in this teachable moment and I prayed He would guide me with parenting her and guiding her. And I thanked Him for trusting me with the task of helping Him shape her.

After we finished cleaning most of the mess I asked Sadie to go to her room and think about what her choice to be angry instead of grateful at Joebys trying to help and bless her accomplished. I asked her to sit quietly and think.

Of course she didn't. She went back and quietly found nail polish and started painting her nails while I was still cleaning the remaining mess. But that's a whole other blog post about my sweetie May. Ha!  

Anyway, while I finished cleaning God brought a few scriptures to mind and some words to share with Sadie.

Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, (Ephesians 4:26 NASB) is one of the passages He reminded me of.

God helped me take a step back in my own busy-ness and messy heart to recognize another little heart He wants to take a more beautiful shape.

But it doesn't stop there. Because I am still His little girl too. So, what did God teach me in that spilled juice moment? To take a step back from what is seen and for a moment recognize what is unseen and eternal. The bigger picture, the deeper purpose of even something as minor as spilled juice. And He helped me step back from my own anger and my own preoccupations and recognize His hand at work!  He helped me to be molded and shaped just as He was shaping little Sadie too. I'm so grateful He cares sou h for me that sometimes He lets the juice spill.

Sometimes, it makes a giant mess.

Sometimes, it may even stain a rug or two and leave a permanent reminder of the work He has done.

Sometimes, it may take a long long time to clean up my messes.

Sometimes, I may need to help someone else with their mess in order to see my own through a clearer lense.

And always, He cares when He lets the juice spill He has enough left to fill the cup back up and let us keep drinking, learning, growing, trying...