Relying Upon Him-He is ABLE

My heart on paper.

Some days I can feel so alone. Some days I can feel so inadequate, incapable, insecure. Feelings shift and change day to day, moment to moment. I'm thankful my feelings change. I'm thankful for being a creation made to experience different emotions, thoughts, feelings. Yet, managing my thoughts, feelings and emotions in a godly way is often a task that feels too high a call; too steep a climb.

I was excited and happy to have our first day of co op. Yet I knowingly was behind on some "tasks" "due" today or before. So, I was feeling a bit ashamed and insecure. If I'm honest, feeling rather incapable also. Raising four precious lives to know, trust and walk with God through their own journey is a big under taking. I do not for a moment take the responsibility lightly or without acknowledgement of the privilege and weight it brings. And sometimes, some days, it all just compounds and I feel "the weight of the world on my shoulders". But I try to trudge along. Picking up my weak and needy feet off the floor and foraging forward.

Today I was reminded of my desperation. My desperation for a God who walks WITH ME in my inadequacies and failures and in my weaknesses and struggles; He walks with me through IT ALL! I was reminded of the importance to cry out to Him! I love the song and proverb that go:

Lean not on your own understanding in all of your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight... Don't worry about tomorrow, He's got it under control. Just trust in The Lord with all of your heart and He will carry you through!

This morning at co-op the woman in charge of co-op's prayer room shared the vision of trying to fly a kite on our own without wind. She shared how the little child may be very excited and may run and throw the kite high into the air expecting it to soar. Yet without the wind it goes only so far. But on a day with great wind the kite can fly and soar and go above all we've expected. Our day without the Holy Spirits help and guidance is much like a day trying to fly a kite without wind. We may be able to accomplish some, but when we invite the Holy Spirit to help He guides and supplies the flight/strength and ABLE-ity to our day! He is ABLE! This vision struck me also because the woman who shared it lost her husband in a sudden farming accident last year and now raises and homeschools her children "alone". But she has a Help, the Holy Spirit! I shed a few tears and again was reminded by My Helper-The Holy Spirit to NOT go it alone but to rely upon Him!

He is ABLE!

I pray that if you're reading this today and feeling like your kite is just too heavy or you just can't go it alone, that you know you don't have to! Invite Him in! He LONGS to go with you on this journey!

Love,
Abi