First and foremost with pregnancy anymore is my fear of losing my child before they are born. After experiencing our loss of Joeli Grace at 5 months for unknown reasons I suppose it's only natural to fear this and pray against it constantly. Next, is a fear for delivery that something could go wrong. We've not experienced some of the more traumatic deliveries. However, with Sadie our "rainbow baby" we almost lost her when her heart-rate dropped and many medical professionals (probably went from one nurse in our room to ten to fifteen in a matter of seconds) rushed into the room talking about the Operating Room and Emergency C-Sections if we couldn't find a way to regulate her heart-rate. Thankfully, moving me into a new labor position seemed to help and she was okay... other than that and having to be checked by NICU staff because of meconium and me not being able to hold her or hear her cry for the first 5 to ten minutes after her birth (so traumatic after everything with Joeli was really just hoping for a simple birth without scares). But now the fears I'm battling are still the first two, and also because my platelets and iron are teetering on the low level and I've been told the potential risks involved if they drop any lower before delivery.
If I'm not careful, any or all of these fears and concerns (whether legitimate or not) can drown out that still small voice of God. His Word it says is, "Sharper than a double edged sword"- Hebrews 4:12. So when I have an enemy (FEAR) I'm facing, I must use this weapon God has given me and I must STAND UP! I must FIGHT! And I must face this enemy like the warrior woman God has been crafting me to be!
So, when I am facing my fears and anxieties I will ask myself do I want to go pro or go home? Not pro in that I know it all or will ever be a pro at any of this... BUT, that I go to the ONE who is the pro and trust Him with all this and more! Some may be uncomfortable with talking about FEAR... so be advised.
Make the Lord of Heaven’s Armies holy in your life.He is the one you should fear. He is the one who should make you tremble. Someone may say to you, “Let’s ask the mediums and those who consult the spirits of the dead. With their whisperings and mutterings, they will tell us what to do.” But shouldn’t people ask God for guidance? Should the living seek guidance from the dead? Look to God’s instructions and teachings! People who contradict his word are completely in the dark. Isaiah 8:13, 19-20
Will you make the choice to GO to GOD instead of seeking other sources of wisdom and help? He is the ONE who should be feared and the only One whom should make me tremble.
So, will YOU choose whom you shall fear and revere?
Will you stand up and be that WARRIOR and fight your battle with the incredible weapon you've been given? HIS WORD. I have been thinking about this powerful weapon all week since Sean read the passage from Ephesians for devotions early this week for our family:
Ephesians 6:13 Therefore, put on every piece of God’s armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm. 14 Stand your ground, putting on the belt of truth and the body armor of God’s righteousness. 15 For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News so that you will be fully prepared.[d] 16 In addition to all of these, hold up the shield of faith to stop the fiery arrows of the devil.[e] 17 Put on salvation as your helmet, and take the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
18 Pray in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all believers everywhere.[f]
For all the things in this life I will never be pro at, I'm thankful to have the PRO to go to. I am constantly amazed at how His word truly does bring such comfort, peace, wisdom and hope to my heart no matter what I am battling.
Today I am reminded of the POWER of this Word--power to provide HOPE in hopeless situations, power to provide comfort in desperately painful times, power to work in cleansing my heart and leading me out of sinful patterns, power to encourage and bless, power to bring peace amidst fear, power to restore marriage, power to give wisdom where confusion exists.
If you're seeking God and these powerful things in your life but don't know where to start, I would encourage you to seek God in His word. A great website is www.biblegateway.com and a wonderful phone app is YouVersion. I have learned and been reminded of so much while doing the Read Through The Bible in a Year app:) Or, feel free to ask me about my walk with God. I don't promise to have all the answers, but I truly believe with all my heart and soul I've found The One who does and I'm ever grateful in this crazy mixed up world to have HIM to turn to in my hurts, sorrows, disappointments and failures, fears, and everything in between.
I'm going PRO :) how bout you? :)
much love,
Abi
ABI, it never ceases to amaze me how well you disguise what- to you- are some of your most glaring weakness or vulnerabilities….I on the other hand sooo readily show mine much more easily. I think at times we forget how truly vulnerable we each are in many ways and only tend to see or react to the things we know to be true about a person directly. I see so little fear in most of your responses, so I do not usually equate fear with You, Abi, nor with how I view you. Yet-I know you share how this approaches your life on many levels. I agree and have moments when those emotions wanna overwhelm calm/peace/and joy with the bitter plague of loss and bitter sorrowing and grieving from the past…..
ReplyDeleteWhat I honestly love the most about the bible is that it repeatedly reminds me that our Father's love, the Holy Spirit's strength, and the work Jesus accomplished through his death on the cross and his resurrection from death itself, is stronger than any propensity I have to fail miserably, greater than any frailty I exhibit, totally complete and sufficient to resolve any misgivings I have with others and with God himself, and absolutely more powerful than ANY word spoken against me or any action taken to cause me irreparable harm! ! ! ! ! The world, the underworld, my own flesh and feelings, and all that life throws my way can not impede nor inhibit anything that the Lord has spoken in the bible. Truth is absolute and Jesus is absolute truth. I KNOW He loves me even when I am unlovable. His mercies are new every single morning. I rest in and because of His unsearchable and deep abiding love, the depth of which all the earth's oceans combined do not compare.
So Abi- together we struggle and travail this side of heaven against the spirits of fear, and anxiety, and obesity, and death itself…..aaaagh, but soon we will struggle NO MORE because Jesus has promised, and I truly believe it, heaven will hold NO fear, NO sorrow, NO separation, NO tragic loss, NO weaknesses, NO MORE PAIN, NO MORE TEARS. Thank you Jesus for the promise of what is to come which is our hope. Sorry I wandered off, but I loved your candor and honesty daughter. I just needed to remind myself how GOOD the LOVE of our LORD is and how these fights will not linger forever! My response is what was stirred inside me Abi, not directly to your post. I loved your post and so appreciate scripture to pull our thoughts away from pure rambling and emotions, and especially from the world's perspective. I just had my thoughts running in a different vein after reading your words.
welcome Jemma, welcome to this world, and sorry for the temporary absence from your heavenly Daddy's throne room to interrupt this world. we await you with arms open wide and praise on our lips for your arrival from heaven.
standing side by side honey-arm in arm-hands folded in prayer-and tongues ready to speak God's word to and over our families!